CATCHING UP: A NUMBERS GAME

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My first blog post in a gabillion years

Dear Readers and Friends,

Remember me? You’d be forgiven if you don’t—it’s been a while. But much has happened in my life since we last met, and with your permission I’d like to catch you up with a quick by-the-numbers review.

Since my last post of December 24, 2014…

Number of months passed:

Fifty-five.

Number of freelance articles published in print:

Somewhere between fifteen and twenty. I’ve been writing articles for my hometown newspaper, The Chronicle-Telegram of Elyria, Ohio. More on that in a moment.

Number of wedding anniversaries celebrated with the Midlife Second Husband:

Four with one more coming up next month. (August 14, if you’d like to send a card.)

Number of grandchildren born:

Three. My son and his wife presented us with a beautiful grandson in 2015. A lovely granddaughter arrived two years later. And last October, my stepson and his wife had their first child, an adorable boy who looks just like my husband did as a baby.

Number of surgeries:

Two. One challenging and whopping big one and one slightly more pedestrian. I’ll spare you the details on the former (although I will tell you that thoracic surgery is not for the faint of heart). The latter was arthroscopic surgery of the knee. Those you at midlife or beyond can relate, I’m sure.

Number of moves:

One. We downsized from our large 1928 French Norman Revival in a westside, lakeside suburb of Cleveland and returned to Lorain County, where I was born and raised. We bought a sweet home in Avon that’s all on one level and has a gorgeous backyard. See?

Number of trips taken:

Two. We traveled to Sanibel Island in 2016 and in 2018 we drove to South Carolina, visiting Charleston and Kiawah Island.

Number of hurricanes experienced and evacuations survived as a result:

One. We were booted off the island in South Carolina by Hurricane Florence and had to make our way north. We made the best of it and visited friends in our old neighborhood in Richmond, Virginia.

Number of writing awards won:

Two. In 2018 and in 2019, I was honored with third and second place, respectively, in the “Best in Ohio Freelance Writer” category under the auspices of the All Ohio Excellence in Journalism awards, which are administered by the Press Club of Cleveland.

Number of fractures:

Zero. Hooray and knock on wood.

Now there is one more number I should share with you, and it’s pretty significant.

Number of books written:

One. One book, friends, picked up by a bona fide publisher. It’s not the book I originally set out to write, but it seems as though it’s the book I needed to write. Looking Back at Elyria: A Midwest City at Midcentury, is forthcoming from The History Press, an imprint of Arcadia Publishing, this November.

Looking Back combines elements of journalism, historical research, and memoir, and I think it captures a time when a typical American city was poised on the bridge between innocence and experience. Based on many of the articles that I’ve written for The Chronicle-Telegram, including an ongoing feature series called “Look Back, Elyria,” the book is a love letter to my hometown.

Which brings me to why I’m writing you now, after all this time.

I expect that this blog, as found on this WordPress site, will be going away in the months to come. I am at work archiving my favorite posts on my new site, www.marcirich.com.

If you would like to stay connected with me, please click on the link to that site and send me a note via the Contact tab at the top navigation bar. If you send me your current email address, I will add you to the distribution list for updates concerning my book and other writing news and pursuits. I have two other books in the works, actually. And who knows? Maybe someone will want to publish a book called The Midlife Second Wife. This way you’ll get in on the ground floor.

Thank you for being along for the ride from the beginning, way back in 2011 when I started this blog in Richmond, Virginia, and through all points in between. It’s been an amazing ride. But then life usually is, isn’t it?

Don’t forget: www.marcirich.com. Send me a note with your email address, and you won’t miss a thing.

Love,
Marci

May Light Find and Follow You This Holiday Season

24 Wednesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Special Events

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Christmas2014To all of my readers, fellow bloggers, family and friends—

Just because I’ve been writing a book and blogging less frequently doesn’t mean that I’ve forgotten about you. As the days have grown shorter and darker, I’m reminded of all the places where I’ve found light and warmth over the past few years. One of those places is right here, on this blog, writing for you, and sharing with you. The Midlife Second Wife is where I’ve made some lasting friendships, met more wonderful people than any WordPress statistic could reveal, and where I’ve encountered extraordinary opportunities. This is never more evident to me than when I’m caught up in preparations for the holiday season. Why is this so? I think it’s because this is such a mindful time of year—a time when we move through our days with particular intention, when we think of the people we love who are no longer here, and the ones we cannot wait to greet with open arms.

I wish you and your loved ones all the illumination and warmth of the holiday season—whether generated by a menorah, by the light from a mosque, by the moon and stars, or, as at our home, by the twinkling candles of a Christmas tree. May the light find you and shine upon you gently, and may peace, love, and happiness be yours, now and throughout the New Year.

Happy Thanksgiving! Please Don’t Pass the Canned Cranberries.

23 Sunday Nov 2014

Posted by in Food for Thought

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CranberrieseditedGrowing up in the 1950s and 1960s, I must have been one of the few children seated at the cousins’ table who didn’t mind eating jellied cranberry sauce from the familiar white, blue and red can. I have fond memories of my mother opening it with her handheld can opener, inserting a knife around the inside to loosen the gelatinous concoction, and the whoosh with which it slid out, shimmering and ridged, onto the plate. My mother was a terrific cook, and I must have reasoned that the least I could do was permit her this one convenience, especially when she stuffed and roasted the turkey at our home in Elyria, and then struggled to secure it in a box to keep warm while my father drove us to my grandmother’s house in Lorain.

Ironically, it was at my grandmother’s—one of the greatest cooks to come to America from Sicily—where I suffered through what I believe to be the most disgusting side dish known to any holiday table: ambrosia, prepared and served with great fanfare by my mother’s sister, who, it must be said, did not inherit the cooking gene. Aunt Helen’s ambrosia looked pretty enough, with its own bright red Jell-O shimmer, but its other ingredient was cottage cheese, something I’ve never liked. I could barely force the stuff down. As I think about it, the canned cranberry sauce was a winner by sheer comparison.

With the passing years, my palate grew more sophisticated. And although I never learned to appreciate my aunt’s culinary effort (the only recipe, actually, that she ever mastered), my disdain for canned cranberry sauce, with its heavy-handed tartness and slightly tinny flavor, finally blossomed into something like hatred.

Give me a dish with layered flavors! Give me subtlety and nuance! Give me, if you will, Ginger Cranberry Sauce. I clipped the recipe from an old Parade magazine article back when the late Sheila Lukins of Silver Palate fame was the food editor. I don’t remember how long ago the recipe was published; but I can no longer remember a Thanksgiving when I didn’t make it. In a line-up of labor-intensive holiday recipes, this is the easiest thing in the world to put together, and it can be made weeks ahead of time. I hope you enjoy it, and I wish you and yours a very Happy Thanksgiving!

GINGER CRANBERRY SAUCE

—Serves 12

1 pound (about 4 cups) fresh cranberries, picked over and rinsed
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup water
Finely grated zest of 1 orange
1/2 cup fresh orange juice
2 tablespoons finely minced fresh ginger

1. Combine all of the ingredients in a saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until the cranberries pop open, about 10 minutes. (Don’t overcook them.)

2. Skim any foam from the surface with a metal spoon. Let cool. Refrigerate, covered, for up to 2 months. Freezes well.

On Creative Writing and Curated Wisdom, Part II

30 Thursday Oct 2014

Posted by in The Writing Life

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CuratedWisdomIn August, I traveled to Provincetown, Massachusetts, at the very tip of Cape Cod, to attend a fiction and memoir workshop at the Fine Arts Work Center with my literary idol, Dani Shapiro. It was an intense week of work, discovery, and joy, a week in which I learned many new things and relearned a few others, not the least of which is the importance of keeping a writing journal.

Shapiro, like the most insightful physician you’ve ever encountered, honed in on our individual manuscripts, but only after each of us chimed in with our notes and comments, questions and praise. She always went last, offering keen observations from her vast experience as a writer and teacher, and reading choice excerpts—carefully chosen to apply to the work at hand—from her small notebook, what she calls her book of “curated wisdom.” For example:

Read the rest of this essay on Boomeon …

…and read Part I here.

 

Yes, I’m Still Writing—and You Can Read Me on Boomeon

13 Monday Oct 2014

Posted by in The Writing Life

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BE-BloggerBadgeI’m pleased to announce that I’m contributing to a nifty website for Baby Boomers, Midlifers, People-of-a-Certain-Age, what have you. Boomeon is a new-ish online community for Baby Boomers and beyond. The site’s marketing director, Natalie Dewhirst, says that Boomeon wanted to create a supportive and safe environment where people can be student and teacher, author and reader, adventurer and observer. Boomeon has created a new section on creativity, and I’m thrilled to write the inaugural essay.

“On Creative Writing and Curated Wisdom” was inspired by my recent stay in Provincetown, where I took a workshop with novelist and memoirist Dani Shapiro. Part II of the essay will appear on Boomeon in a couple of weeks. If you want to be sure not to miss it, please visit my profile page and click “Follow” at the bottom.

I hope to see you there! And I’ll still check in here from time to time, although (as you might have noticed) I’m blogging less and writing more. That book’s not going to write itself, now is it?

As always, thank you for your support…and for reading me!

Dani Shapiro's wonderful book, Still Writing, is always near my side.

Dani Shapiro’s wonderful book, Still Writing (far left on my shelf), is always close at hand.

 

 

Where I’ve Been … Where I’m Going

12 Tuesday Aug 2014

Posted by in The Writing Life, Transitions, Travel

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Cleveland Clinic photo by Marci Rich
The Fine Arts Work Center, Provincetown, Mass. Sarah Hersey photo.

It’s been too long, readers. Far too long. And for that I apologize. I never intended to take such an extended hiatus. But life has a way of telling you that things aren’t as they should be. For the past 10 months, Life-With-a-Capital L has literally shoved me down and sat on top of me in an attempt to get my attention. (And I can say literally with complete impunity, because I fell in November, broke a bone in my foot, and it was the end of March before I was in a full and upright position.)

Turns out there was a reason for the delicacy of my metatarsal. I had primary hyperparathyroid disease, rendering me hypercalcemic. Lots of medical jargon, I know. Let me put it more simply: my excellent endocrine surgeon at the Cleveland Clinic removed two-and-one-half of my parathyroid glands during an operation on July 2 because there were tumors on them. (Thankfully, they were benign.) When bad things happen to good parathyroids, all hell breaks loose. Think of those tiny, rice-shaped glands as the traffic cops for the calcium in your body. When they break bad, they blow their little traffic-cop whistles to tell your system it needs more calcium, resulting in a widespread evacuation from your bones and a flood in your bloodstream, wreaking widespread havoc.

The extraordinary result of my surgery was evident in about a week. I soon had more energy than I knew what to do with. My aches and pains subsided. I could sit at my desk and concentrate, which is a good thing, because a writing deadline loomed. Which brings me to where I’m going.

MorgueFile Image

MorgueFile Image

When Life Hands You Lemons, Write.
I began writing in earnest while stuck in bed with my fracture, which seems like an excellent use of my situation. I started what I thought would be a memoir, but at some point during the process my reliable instincts told me that what I was really doing was writing fiction. I was also reading Dani Shapiro’s beautiful and wise memoir about the creative process, Still Writing, at the time. My instincts, like Life, had shoved me down (without breaking anything) and sat on top of me to get my attention. I listened, and then checked to see whether I could find a space in one of her workshops.

Shapiro’s fiction and memoir workshop at the Fine Arts Work Center in Provincetown, Massachusetts, was the one that I wanted—”Transforming Chaos into Art.” The class was full. I was first on the wait-list.

And then, in March, I got the phone call I was hoping for: a spot opened up for me. I was in! I secured my registration and located a place to stay. And then, in May, I discovered how sick I really was.

For weeks I worried about whether I’d be well enough to travel, and whether I’d have the energy to do the writing I needed to do.

And so, the surgery. And hence, during my recovery, the writing.

You can see why I wasn’t blogging.

I still won’t post as frequently as you’ve become accustomed to, but I hope you’ll understand that I’ve taken on a whale of a project, and I need to keep working away at my manuscript. I will check in when I can.

I leave early Saturday morning for Boston. A bus will take me to Hyannis, where a good friend will pick me up and take me to her home in Harwich for a visit. The next morning, she’ll drive me to Provincetown, at the very tip of Cape Cod. That will be my home for a week. And there, at the beautiful Fine Arts Work Center, I’ll be sitting in a classroom for the first time in 23 years.

Given where I’ve been, I’m looking forward to where I’m going.

 

 

 

 

 

Dancing with my Father

13 Friday Jun 2014

Posted by in Relationships and Family Life, Special Events, The Cultured Life

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DancingwithDad“We only ever danced at weddings …” That’s a line from a poem I wrote nearly 25 years ago about my father. I was a 33-year-old creative writing student at Oberlin College then, still working through the 20-year-old grief of losing my father soon after I turned 13. In the 1960s, my father and I had several opportunities to dance together—three of my cousins were married in elaborate celebrations of love, with opulent receptions in Cleveland hotel ballrooms. The remnants of these memories reveal snapshot scenes: a fountain flowing with champagne, my glamorous cousins in gowns, relatives and strangers linked in the dabke, a traditional Lebanese folk dance accompanied by drums. But like so much of what passed for happiness in the 1960s, these moments were evanescent. Even the hotels are gone.

That’s why I’m so grateful to have this picture of my dad. There aren’t many of them; he was always the one taking the pictures. One of my cousins found an undeveloped roll of film in her late mother’s apartment, took it to a photography store in Cleveland, and surprised me with this print.

As Father’s Day approaches, my dad feels closer to me than ever. I’m sorting through old photos of him (courtesy of my cousin), reading his war letters home, and working on a memoir in which he has the starring role. I’m also sorting through some of my old photo albums, and came across this picture, which symbolizes so much for me.

MarciDabke copy

The author performing the dabke at an international festival.

After my father died, my Sicilian-American mother wanted to keep his heritage alive for me. She joined the local Lebanese social club, and I was enlisted to dance with other young people at the Lorain International Festival. This would have been around 1972. In this photo, I’m performing the dabke, the dance I learned as a child, watching my relatives at those glamorous weddings.

Two years later, I would represent my culture as the Lebanese-Syrian Princess at this same festival. But that’s another story.

All my life, I thought I was participating in these activities to please my mother and honor my father’s memory. It’s only now that I realize the dancing was as much for me as it was for him, keeping the rhythm of love and family alive in my heart.

 

On the 70th Anniversary of D-Day, a Reminder of What They Fought For

06 Friday Jun 2014

Posted by in Current Events, Love, Nostalgia

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AuBonMarcheAllied1The news is filled with reminders that 70 years ago today, the tide turned on the beaches of Normandy, France, when the United States led Allied Forces in an offensive that changed the course of World War II, leading to victory on the European front, or V-E Day, on May 8, 1945. My father served in that war, although he was stationed with the U.S. Army in the Persian Gulf. And while his brother served with the Army in the war’s European theater, I’m not sure if my Uncle Norman was part of the charge on D-Day. As I think about this historic anniversary, I’m reminded of how difficult it must have been for my grandparents to have two of their three sons in harm’s way.

I’m also reminded of something else—something that lies at the heart of civilization: Love. I’ve been reading the letters that my father wrote home during the war, and recently found a trove of other memorabilia. Just this afternoon—on the anniversary of D-Day—I opened a folded brochure that serves as the illustration to this post—a “shopping guide for allied soldiers in the French department stores.” The famed Au Bon Marché (known today as Le Bon Marché) made this guide to the metro available “with heartiest greetings,” as the publication proudly declares. The French, the ne plus ultra of all things civilized and cultured, knew that even far from home, a soldier would have someone to shop for.

AuBonMarcheAllied2The guide includes some helpful translations, as you can see in the first image. I think this one’s my favorite:

What kind of ladie’s [sic] lingerie have you?
Quel genre de lingerie pour dame avez-vou?
Kel janr de’r linsh’ree poor dahm away voo?

In all seriousness, the French knew that they and their allies were fighting not only for freedom from oppression, tyranny, and injustice—they were fighting for the preservation of the very thing that makes the world go ’round.

Vive l’amour!

 

Gearing up for War: A Soldier’s Letters Home

26 Monday May 2014

Posted by in Nostalgia, Relationships and Family Life, Transitions

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MRich_WWIIlettersThey date from June 1942 to June 1945—three years of a life interrupted by the Second World War. They’ve held up surprisingly well, given they are more than 70 years old. They’ve survived scorching summers and frigid winters in various attics, as well as several moves, but they did not survive their author, my father. His letters home to his parents, who owned a small grocery store in Elyria, Ohio, begin and end in June, which would also be the month that he died, in 1969, when I was 13. I’m 58 now, and it has taken me 14 years—ever since I found them in my mother’s attic after her death—to get around to reading them. Filled with bravado and fear, boredom and enthusiasm, pride in his country but a keen longing for home, they are, other than photographs, the only tangible artifacts that I have of my father’s voice and personality; very few people who remember him are still alive. I’m finally getting around to reading these letters because I’m writing a memoir inspired by my father’s absence, and by his interrupted influence on my life.

You might say that I’m finally getting to know him.

Private First Class George G. Abookire was stationed in the Middle East with the U.S. Army’s Persian Gulf Command—a stroke of more than good luck. His posting was a deliberate tack by his commanding officers, since my father could speak Arabic fluently. A first-generation American born in Elyria, where his parents eventually settled, his father was born in Beit El Dine, Mount Lebanon, an area of Syria that would, after the First World War, become what is now known as Lebanon. His mother was born in the neighboring village of Deir El Amar. Both villages were located near the cities of Zahle and Beirut, and when I was growing up my grandparents defined themselves as coming from Zahle. (Rather like people from Elyria saying that they’re from Cleveland.) That I have this information at all is the result of much diligent work and research by several of my father’s first cousins, and—surprisingly enough—his Polish nephew-in-law, who has an abiding interest in genealogy.

The letters begin as my father, 21, is en route to his first training camp at Camp Barkeley, Texas, following his induction in Ohio. He graduated from Elyria High School in 1939, but didn’t enroll in college. It’s clear from this letter that he hasn’t traveled all that much:

In the beautiful hills of East Tennessee…

….It’s really beautiful here, Ma. The people and everything is [sic] so simple but yet they seem that they’re not doing enough for you. Ray’s mother-in-law is swell and his sisters are simply be a u t i f u l to look at in fact all the Southern girls are. …

Try and not work too hard Ma as I don’t want you to. I’d like to see you & Pa on a vacation this year & if its up to me you’re going to have it. Life here is simply grand & wonderful to be in. I can’t find words for it Ma. You’ll have to see it yourself. It’s a different world all together here and I just about wished I were born here….

Your loving boy, George

By the time he reaches Texas, the bloom has come off the rose, but his training as a medic clearly has engaged him:

I didn’t intend to write today as I just don’t know what to do with myself lately. The Captain had my explanation on the history of my chest pains, as the other day one of the Corporals here said I was just a slacker & no good to the army. After telling the Capt. I passed navy & air corps he sort of pricked his ears up. Outside of that I’m a 100% buddy around here to all the boys.…

The studying is terrific. You really have to study to keep up with the awful large amounts of work they give you. Anatomy, Physiology, Pharmacy & bacterial media. It’s fun though….

********

Tuesday night…just got off kitchen duty. I had 11-1/2 hours of it & we just scrubbed every thing after each meal.

I’m in the tent now writing by flashlite [sic] smoking a R.G.Dun that you sent me.

Truthfully Dad the army was tough over where we were at but somehow I managed to overcome it but this out here on the edge of the camp is something else to swallow. We have no toilets. Just a wooden shed & room for 10 or 12 & you can smell it way over on this side of the road as our tent is the last one on the end from Headquarters.

As I told Ma we had a miniature hurricane here Sat. while we moved. Our raincoats saved us but our feet & hands froze & we had to set up new living quarters (tents) kitchens & dig ditches & all in all that rain. One fellow in our Co. caught pneumonia & died yesterday. This life here is so tragic & unbearable I don’t see how I’ll take it. 2 of the boys here went A.W.O.L. Sunday. I went to the show & walked around about 6 miles in camp.…We have no lights … we’re not even to go to the toilet at night. We shower in cold water & then we only have 3 faucets for over 300 men.

I could go on telling you about this but what’s the use of it. My studies are terribly hard Pa but I’ll get it.…Drill study – Drill – classes & then sleep & all over again. I wouldn’t know what to do if I could be home with all of you now. It’s like looking for an actuality but you know your [sic] living on borrowed time. Well I’ll just have to swallow it.…

The experiences at Camp Barkeley, where my father is a member of Company A, 62nd M.R.T.C., underscore not only how challenging all of this soldiering will be, but also how the Army is still building from scratch. His reference to “living on borrowed time” suggests a familiarity with the real horror of the unknown. Reading these letters with the benefit of history and hindsight—we know how the war will end, and I know that my father will survive it—emphasizes their in-the-moment nature. He doesn’t know his fate, nor do his “buddies” in the camp.

I never thought of that before. On past Memorial Days, when I’ve thought of my father as an army veteran—a member of Tom Brokaw’s “Greatest Generation”—I thought of him in his uniform, thrilled by the adventure of it all, proud to do his part for what he calls, in a subsequent letter, “the good ol’ U.S. of A,” and visiting family in Lebanon while stationed in Iran. It never occurred to me to consider what had to come before the neatness and the pride and the adventure: hard, back-breaking work in the constant rain, and the fear of an unsettled life.

My father in uniform during the Second World War. The photo in the rear, to the left, shows him as a young boy holding his baby sister.

My father in uniform during the Second World War. The photo in the rear, to the left, shows him as a young boy holding his baby sister. Included in the photo of his letters (above) is a picture of him in football gear with two of his buddies from the medics. He’s in the center.

 

Portraits of the Artist: Actress Linda Lavin and ‘A Short History of Decay’

14 Wednesday May 2014

Posted by in Inspiring Women, Portraits of the Artist, Relationships and Family Life, The Cultured Life, Transitions

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Award-winning actress Linda Lavin in a scene from "A Short History of Decay"

Award-winning actress Linda Lavin in A Short History of Decay

There’s a remarkable scene in A Short History of Decay, the début film by writer/director Michael Maren, that will be familiar to anyone whose life has ever been touched by illness—which is to say all of us. Sandy Fisher, played with exquisite nuance by award-winning actress Linda Lavin, is in the early stages of Alzheimer’s and aware that she’s losing her lucidity. Sandy has just had a brave, candid conversation about the reality of her illness with her son, Nathan, a writer played by Bryan Greenberg. She reveals how scared her husband (Harris Yulin)—is by the prospect of losing her—he’s in poor health himself, having suffering a stroke. The ostensible subject of the conversation is Sandy’s need to move into an assisted-living center, but the subtext is mortality, and Lavin’s performance is a master class in acting. It is during their embrace, when her son cannot see her eyes, that she reveals the fear and terror she’s kept at bay.

Linda & Bryan Hug

I’ve kept my eye on this beautiful film throughout its development. My mother had Alzheimer’s. Unlike Lavin’s character, however, my mother was not aware of what was happening to her—her version of the disease announced itself suddenly, with episodes of paranoid delusions. Having lived through her nightmare, I can’t say I would have preferred a gradual declension of the sort embodied by Sandy Fisher—the “short history of decay” that would have allowed for time to accept and adjust and plan. Knowing my mother as I did, I think that living with an awareness of what was happening to her mind would have horrified her.

My focus on this scene, and my interest in the Alzheimer’s arc of the film, should in no way mislead you into thinking that A Short History of Decay is depressing. Far, far from it. The film’s triumph is the hope that plays like a horizon note throughout its patient, careful storytelling. That, and its moments of pure grace and humor. Maren, whose mother has Alzheimer’s, drew from his own life in writing the film, which he has called “a darkish comedy.” Critics such as Marshall Fine of the Huffington Post are praising Maren for managing “the nifty tonal trick of telling a tragic tale and somehow making you feel hopeful about its characters.”

I had the chance to interview Linda Lavin by phone during the run-up to the film’s release; it opens in New York City at the Village East Cinemas on May 16. I asked what she looks for in a script or screenplay, and what, in particular, drew her to Maren’s film.

“I look for a script that makes me laugh and cry while I’m reading it,” she says. “Michael’s screenplay felt comic, tragic, real, funny, and sad.”

How did Lavin prepare for the role of a woman afflicted with Alzheimer’s?

“I didn’t prepare,” she says. “I just showed up. I used my imagination, and what was in the script—what Michael had written. This is a personal story for him, so we would ask him questions. He was a very gentle guide as a director.”

But enough telling. Let me show you the trailer for the film:

Alice Doesn’t Work Here Anymore
Lavin’s portrayal of Sandy Fisher might surprise audiences who know her only as the iconic and beloved waitress Alice Hyatt from the hit CBS series Alice, a role which earned her two back-to-back Golden Globe awards. So, for those who haven’t kept up with her career, here’s a quick primer: Two years after Alice ended its nine-year run in 1985, Lavin won a Tony Award for her performance as Neil Simon’s mother in Broadway Bound, a role for which she also won Drama Desk, Outer Critics’ Circle, and Helen Hayes awards.

All in all, Lavin has earned six Tony nominations—for The Last of the Red Hot Lovers, The Diary of Anne Frank (where, as Mrs. Van Daan, she was first paired as Harris Yulin’s wife), The Tale of the Allergist’s Wife, Collected Stories, and The Lyons.

At 77, Lavin is as busy as ever. In addition to the release of A Short History of Decay, she stars in a new play at the Vineyard Theatre in Manhattan. Nicky Silver, who wrote The Lyons, created the part of Audrey Langham in Too Much Sun for Lavin.

“I’m excited to be playing this character—a successful American actress having one spiritual awakening after another,” she says.

When I asked her what life experience had the most significant effect on her art and on her career, her answer was that of a woman intimately familiar with spiritual awakenings:

“Life is about evolving. I can’t say I would point to one experience. I believe everybody and everything that’s ever happened to me has gotten me this far. I have more to learn, more to do. Each experience leads me to a place of knowledge and surrender and truth, and the ability to accept things as they are and the courage to change the things I can.”