All right, it’s time for a reality check. Unless I live to be 110, I’m technically past my midlife shelf life—so far over the rainbow as to be nearly under it. (But what was I going to call this blog, anyway? The Over-the-Hill Second Wife? The Old Second Wife? To Infinity and Beyond with the Midlife Second Wife? These are hardly euphonious, and the first two less than complimentary.) I was reminded—painfully—of the disparity between my chronological age (55) and a more accurate midpoint (say, 40 or so), this morning while catching up on my local newspaper reading. The Richmond Times-Dispatch runs a monthly column, “Viva the Vital!” by a boomer named Matt Thornhill; he’s president of the Boomer Project, based here in my adopted hometown. The Boomer Project provides advice and information about our robust demographic to organizations and corporations. For example, did you know that we Boomers and our elders spend $3.5 trillion dollars annually on goods and services? But back to Thornhill and his Thanksgiving Day column. He started things off with a quote by comedienne Rosanne Barr, who said: “C’mon, I ain’t living to age 106, so I am waaay past the halfway point.”
Ouch. Thanks, Rosanne. Thanks, Matt. No, really—thanks. Because this got me thinking—always a good exercise when writing a blog.
Many of us in our 50s and 60s don’t feel old. Do we? And if we’re careful and follow all of the good advice out there, Thornhill reminds us that thanks to the miracle of modern medicine and technologies, the new normal is such that we could very well live—and live well—into our 80s and beyond. And if such is the case, we’ve got a good 20 to 30 years to fill.
It’s nice to have the extra time. But what are we going to do with it?
Thornhill writes that he and his colleagues at the Boomer Project “believe that boomers are going to fulfill their ‘promise’ as a generation by individually living out their own personal promise or agenda.” You might recall that ours is the generation that intended to change the status quo in the 1960s. Thornhill quotes Tom Brokaw, who famously chronicled our generational predecessors in The Greatest Generation. Apparently Brokaw thinks that we baby boomers squandered our opportunity to make a lasting, positive difference in the world.
I’m happy to read that Thornhill disagrees with Brokaw’s assessment. And here’s where we can take up the challenge. If you believe, as Thornhill does, that we still have the opportunity, in the next 20 years, to apply “our collective wisdom and experience from our ever-increasing trips around the sun, [then] our legacy as a generation is in front of us.” We can effect positive change on “companies, organizations, governments, each other and other generations,” as long as we “live our promise.” And Thornhill believes that it is our personal promises, as boomers, that will make the difference; he predicts that most of them will be outwardly focused.
What is your promise—to yourself, your family, your community? I’ve already made one or two—and I should mention that these are nothing like New Year’s resolutions. When the opportunity is appropriate, I’ll share my promise on the blog. But I would love to know what the boomers among you think:
Did we, as a generation, blow our chance to leave a lasting and positive legacy? Or is the best, as Frank Sinatra sang, yet to come?
Your commenta are always enjoyable from quite a few perspectives: you’ve got a great sense of humour; you share your life stories; you encourage your readers to do some introspection. i’m making a few promises as I sit under the dryer. Love that you embrace all of life, including great recipes.
Thanks so much, Diana—for the comment and for reading and supporting the blog! I’m very honored that you are among my readers.
Love it love it! I so enjoy your humor and am glad to know that wit and writing is not a lost art!
That’s so very kind of you! Thank you!!
I’m 48, and cheerfully think of myself as ‘barely middle-aged’ but that means I have to live to 100 for that to be true. It does make one think. Regarding Mr. Brokaw’s assessment – well, I think that boomers did do quite a lot that changed the world — the sexual revolution and the civil rights movement are turning points in American history that laid the groundwork for a world our kids take utterly for granted – one in which women chart their own destinies instead of falling prey to the “feminine mystique”, and one in which a racially mixed marriage produces a future President of the United States instead of social isolation or lynching.
I don’t really see how the best is yet to come from the boomer generation though – they are aging and history tends to demonstrate that people become more rigid and less open to new experiences and ways of thinking as they age. There is a reason that high tech is full of the mostly young and not the very old. ( “What does anyone need a cell phone for?” my 70 year old dad likes to growl in annoyance.)
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment, and for reading the blog! I agree with you about boomers in that my cohort did do quite a lot to make a positive difference in the world. The protest movement, to cite another example, helped bring about the end of the Vietnam War. I do, however, disagree about us as being rigid and less open to new experiences. Something that set my generation apart is the very thing that makes us eager to embrace new technologies—a curiosity about the world around us. Although I’m a late adopter when it comes to Twitter and blogging, I’ve been on Facebook for years and couldn’t function without my iPhone. Maybe part of that is because I worked at a college for so long, and the students kept me young. I like to think, though, that it’s part of the vivacity of “my generation.”
Also, our music was so much better than anything being written now.
🙂
Thanks again for sharing your insights! I very much enjoyed reading his comment.
–Marci
The best is yet to come! Time becomes more readily available after the nest is emptied. And there is so much to accomplish before “old age” settles in. I take every opportunity to teach preschoolers and adults alike about the health advantages of organic farming and cooking. And it is never too late to live happily ever after! My second marriage is the best decision of my life, and my hubby is a God-sent. Together we have much to impart to our grown children, grandchildren, and the community.